Friday, November 4, 2011

Is Your Pregnancy a Wedding or a Marriage?

I grew huge babies. My last five were nine pounds or more. And it showed while they were baking in the womb. I would often be mistaken being at term when, I've just started my second semester and once, a doctor actually misdiagnosed my due date because of my baby's size.

Having a juicy, round belly while pregnant is the one time women really want the belly. There's nothing sweeter than the sight of a woman rubbing her belly proudly. Sometimes, I even see a bit of exaggeration when walking (waddling) down the aisles of the store. With an slightly arched back and hands planted firmly at the hips, that belly insists on being noticed.

Then there's the other side of having a round belly that boasts of baby...belly envy. One too many times, I've been the focus of it. With my short torso and propensity for large babies, there's no doubt of baby in the belly by the end of my first trimester. The round belly is the prominent prospect of pregnancy. The one thing women dream of when becoming pregnant.

There's nothing wrong with desiring that roundness and anticipating the flutters and rolls that come with it, but too many times, I hear disappointment when some moms-to-be become envious when their roundness doesn't quite measure up to their expectation. I've seen those sad side ways glance when perusing my pregnant belly or those of others. The only thing that sad to me, is not their "missing" roundness, but their disappointment.

Like a wedding to a marriage, the experience of pregnancy can be overlooked, when it doesn't live up to certain physical expectations. Often times that disappointment comes when a mom compares herself to others.

Every pregnancy experience is different. Body size, baby size and baby position will define the belly. Your pregnant belly should never be compared to another. Your body is your own unique vessel for your baby. It will not look, act or behave like anyone else's.

If your baby belly isn't living up to your expectations of roundness, here's a few things you can do...


  1. Accept your body for what it is...yours. Characteristically, you are unique. If you are having a healthy pregnancy, embrace that experience!
  2. Examine your attitude. Are you treating your pregnancy like a wedding, a temporary celebration? Or a marriage, the beginning of a life long relationship? Sometimes we need to recognize when we're taking on a "bridezilla" approach to our pregnancy. 
  3. This may sound a contrary, but I encourage first-timers not to read too many pregnancy books! There are masses of books on the market vying for your attention and too many of those books can cause major insecurities amongst first time mom-to-be. 
  4. Talk to, or consult with a midwife about your pregnancy. Midwives are more likely to give you good, solid, myth-busting information about pregnancy.
Your belly may not be the size you wish for, but it's carrying that beautiful being that will, one day very soon, bring you unimaginable joy! For that alone, it should be celebrated, pampered and loved. 

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